SOP writing for dummies

When it comes to applying for Masters abroad, giving GRE is the easiest part. Some universities even ask for the years when you finished your class 1 to class 10 individually. For the benefit of future aspirants i will put down a simple procedure for writing SOPs and recommendation letters - a chat between me and my cousin. Its ad verbatim except some details [in {}]censored.

VC: dude
bro: whats up???

VC: the sop :)
did u review?

bro: read your SOP
looks good

VC: ok...

bro: too big

VC: oh!!

bro: one page man

VC: oh.. thats too small man

bro: nope
mine was a page
too much details
about {dept} engg

VC: ok....

bro: and networks and bullshit
nobody cares

VC: ok...

bro: first talk about background
{college}

VC: ok....

bro: courses
relevant
etc etc
then
{company}
what ou did there

VC: ok...

bro: then say i want to do
meng in CS
to gain more knowledge
about certain areas
and done

VC: wah!!
:)
i will trim it

bro: yeah

VC: i will remove all those world crap n all

bro: nobody wants to read more than a page
seriously
everyone knows networks are ubiquiotus
you dont have to tell them

VC: ya ya
:)

bro: :)
this is my opinion
trim it to a page
and shoot me a copy

VC: yap.. i will

bro: and i will tell you
what more to do
sounds good?

VC: cool...
y a p

bro: excellent

VC: i will also fwd u my lors... take a look at em also

bro: lors?

VC: recos

bro: oh
ok
in my opinion
as long as they say good student
motivated
hard working
shows keen interest to learn new things
good enough

VC: :)
ya.. i will include these words

bro: and do include

VC: they are tehre anyways

bro: the fact that cousin in {univ}
if you are applying here

VC: ok.. ya sounds good

bro: why {univ}
because i heard great things abt courses at {univ}
excellent faculty
rigorous and multitude of courses
and plethora of opportunities

VC: haha

bro: through my brother

VC: cool!!

bro: who is currently a MS PhD candidate in the {Dept}
ok?

VC: yo


I went to the college to find out a teacher who would give me a recomendation letter. Most of them had already been picked by fellow applicants and to keep your own and their chances of getting an admit intact you try to minimise the number of recomendations a faculty gives for the same university.

I stood in the department lobby waiting for the teacher and she finally came. I made eye contact with her and smiled. She kept walking.

VC:"Mam .. i need to talk to you"

Mam:"Come"

I am about to take my chair and she says

Mam:"Recomendation letter aa?"

VC:"Yes Mam!"

Mam:"All through the semester , you just slept in the class and now you want recomendation letter!!??"

VC:"Mam.. please mam!"

Mam:"But why should i give you?"

VC:"Because i am applying for {course-name} course and you had taught us {sub-name} subject."

Mam:"Alright.. get a draft in proper format. I will review it and then get evrything at one go. I wont keep signing every now and then. You can go."

VC: PHEW!

And then the madam was the most sweetest of all when it actually came down to signing and filling the online forms. Weird?. You bet!.